Tips for effective communication in relationships

Communication isn't always easy, but it is a factor for a healthy relationship. Follow these tips for effective communication with your partner.

Communicating well isn't about blurting things out as soon as they occur to you. You have to find the right time to discuss important issues with your partner. If you're feeling bothered about something, wait until there is a time when you are alone together and nothing else is going on. If your partner is busy or stressed about other things, they won't respond as well to your concerns.

Even when you mean to say something productive, it can sometimes come off in a negative tone. Take care to always approach the conversation with positivity and don't attack your partner with sudden accusations. Try starting your thoughts with "I" instead of "you" so it doesn't seem like you are blaming or criticizing them. For example, you can say "I would like to spend more time with you" instead of "you haven't been around enough lately."

If you find yourself getting angry or overly emotional in a conversation, remember that you can take a break and return to the discussion later. People are more likely to say hurtful things when they're angry, and they're also not as effective at expressing themselves. Take some time to go for a walk, talk to your friends, watch TV or do something calming so you don't end up making things worse.

Your words aren't the only way you communicate with your partner. If you are distracted, lying down, fidgeting or doing something else while your partner is talking, he or she won't feel that you're really listening. Take time to focus on your partner by sitting up and looking them in the eye while they are talking. Don't let a phone call or a TV show distract you from the conversation; instead, devote your time and energy towards giving them the same courtesy that you would expect while you're talking.