Tips to care for an aging parent at home

Here are some tips to help you do the best possible job of caring for an aging parent at home.

Unless it is absolutely necessary, don't quit your job to care for aging parents. You might have more time to spend with them, but you have no idea how long you will be caring for them and how much it will damage your retirement savings and financial plans for the future. Also, keep in mind that you might be less attractive to employers if you quit working for a few years. Try to make time for them around the constraints of your job.

In addition to budgeting your own expenses, you'll now want to make a caregiving budget that gives you a realistic estimate of how much it is going to cost to take care of parents. Include household expenses, medical expenses, entertainment, food and anything else that you're spending money on. You can also include your parents' resources in your budget so that you can find the best ways to support them.

It can be a hard conversation to have, but it's important to talk to your parents about what their wishes are for after they have passed away. You should find out what they would want in different scenarios, if they have a will, where they would like to be buried or cremated, and so on. It will give you both peace of mind to know that these details have been settled.

Don't take on the care of parents all by yourself. Enlist the help of your siblings or your parents' other relatives to help you split the caretaking duties if possible. Other family members can provide all kinds of support, whether it's financial, emotional or actually being present to help out with some of the day-to-day stuff.

It's best to communicate with your parents by offering options, not strictly giving them advice or telling them what to do. Express your concerns and ask for their ideas too. Listen well, and try to keep the discussion open so that they feel cared for but not controlled.